Matters of Tea and Facial Hair
by SoulofFireHeartofDragon
Summary: Doing something without telling the Chosen One always led to verious after effects. Including broken windows and the forbiddance of tea. Who needs the stuff anyway? Obi-Wan and Anakin friendship fic, my attempt at somthing mildly humorous. No slash.


**A/N: I have never really expanded myself into the Star Wars universe, I also haven't ever written a fanfiction on it before. However, having recently re-watched all of them agian, I couldn't help but write this. So please excuse anything that is inaccurate or not following traditional Star Wars data, I basically lied my way through this. I apologize. Anyways, here it is. Hope you enjoy, I love feedback.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars. Trust me, Episode 2 would have been different. **

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><p>"What's wrong with your face?"<p>

Obi-Wan Kenobi, force-told master of the chosen one, stared blankly at the younger padawan. Large blue orbs stared back as tired hands fought to rub sleep from them.

"How do you mean?"

The fifteen-year old removed his hand from his eyes and gestured to his chin vaguely, "That. It's weird."

Self-consciously Obi-Wan stroked the newest addition to his appearance as Anakin continued to stare. Leave it to the boy to turn something mundane into an inquiry. "Plenty of Jedi have facial hair Anakin;" he explained, "I wouldn't classify it as weird."

The padawan seemed to consider the point as he sat down at the table from across Obi-Wan, "I know Master, but I was saying it looked weird on you. Like, you're too young. Why would you do that to your face?"

Withholding a groan as the conversation repeated itself, and not really knowing an answer to satisfy the curious inventor, Obi-Wan firmly ended the conversation. "If there is no point to your questions, Anakin, I suggest you hurry and eat your breakfast."

The boy looked like he was going to give a response, but instead turned his attention to his cereal. Going back to his own breakfast, the young master smiled at his victory. Though the subject would likely make reappearance after the boy had woken up some, usually right before dinner, he was willing to prolong it in exchange for a quiet breakfast. Like today, sweet Force there was literally no noise. No anything, even Anakin was…

"Was it because of the mission with Master Windu?"

"No Anakin," Focus on the cereal, ignore him and he will let it go.

"Really? Cuz you were gone for like, two months, and Master Windu said you had been separated for a while so I'm assuming that meant you were also parted with you razor…"

"When did you start talking to Master Windu?"

The boy either didn't hear him, or chose to ignore him, because the constant stream of words and theories continued.

"Like, the beard is cool and all, but it looks weird on your face. You look old now. Like Qui-Gon. I don't like it." His face scrunched up as if the thought of it disgusted him, " Did you like it when Master Qui-Gon grew a beard for the first time?"

"I've never seen him without one."

"Oh, well Master Windu said he had seen him one or two times so I'd thought I asked. Do you dye your hair?"

"You asked Windu about my beard? And, No," he turned back to his tea hoping to receive some reprieve from the talkative Chosen One. Apparently the force was not with him today.

"How long will it last?"

"Will what last Anakin?" He took a long sip of the herbal tea and tried not to look too happy that the conversation had seemingly taken another turn.

"Your beard," came the matter-of-fact reply.

The hopeful smile quickly disappeared; his padawan was relentless this morning.

"What do you have against my facial hair?"

Anakin had at least enough decency to look sorry for the attack of the questions, but it was quickly replaced by a smirk, "You look old."

Obi-Wan buried his face even further behind his mug, "Yes, well, when you're my age, you will grow a beard and think differently of it."

"Is that what Master Qui-Gon told you?"

Obi-Wan paused. The child really was trying to rouse him today. Deciding some relaxing tea would keep from killing the inquisitive teen, he got up and began boiling more water. A pressing headache painfully informed him that it would be taking more than one cup of tea to raise the Chosen One that day. Perhaps also some headache represents. Yes, he would go see the healers after he left Anakin with Master Yoda around lunchtime. It would be perfect. That was, of course, all pending on the fact that he survived a lightsaber practice with the boy. The same boy who had avoided him to here war stories of his master. He smiled as an idea came to him. Yes, this afternoon would be complete bliss..

"Master, you're lost in thought again."

Obi-Wan coughed and returned to the table with a smile still plastered to his face, "No, Qui-Gon never told me that. Now, please eat and study. You have a lot to get done today."

Anakin nodded, a bit scared at how his master was smiling at him, but went back to eating nonetheless.

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><p>He was really regretting ever mentioning the beard as he stood in front of Master Windu's door before lightsaber practice. "Can't I practice with you today?" He pleaded. Because hey, Obi-Wan would always be a better fighter to him, but Windu was unforgiving when it came to practicing.<p>

"I thought you and him were starting to get along?"

"No master," he shook his head for emphasis, "he hates me, remember?"

Looking down at his fearful padawan Obi-Wan fought down a chuckle, "Not from what I heard this morning. Sounds like I got back and you delayed seeing me just to speak with him."

Anakin was really starting to get nervous now. His energetic hands played with his robes while the balls of his feet bounced impatiently on the carpeted floor. "Yea, well, my friends were going to ask him some questions for a report, so I went along with it. I needed the answers anyway."

His master looked relieved at the news, but all hope that Obi-Wan had bought the story was smashed as the revered Master Windu opened the door.

Bowing, Mace greeted them, "Kenobi and Skywalker. Good day to both of you. Is there something you needed?"

Obi-Wan nodded, "Anakin is in need of a sparring partner for today."

Windu nodded, though his expression betrayed his confusion. "Are you not capable of training him for this afternoon?"

"Yes, but he needed some change in his regimen."

"I sense there is something else belonging to the situation, Kenobi."

Skywalker tried desperately to sneak behind his master, but Obi-Wan grabbed him by his hood, "Anakin here…"

"Why the beard?"

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><p>Obi-Wan looked up at being interrupted. Mace Windu's face was heavily concentrated on his chin as he sent out his force signature to prod at the young master's health.<p>

"You were on the mission master," he joked. Or tried to, the nervous chuckle that followed the sentence silenced the area.

Mace smiled, "I thought you would have gotten rid of it by now."

Before Obi-Wan could think about retorting and scarring his apprentice for life by the mistreatment of a council member, Master Luminara came up behind Anakin who was now trying to look twice as small.

"Masters. Master Windu, if you would but allow me a small minute I have matters to discuss…Kenobi. Why the facial hair?"

"Careful master, your face will freeze that way," Anakin chided quietly from behind. Obi-Wan turned to his padawan who quickly wiped the smile from his face.

"Forget I ever needed anything," he told Windu. Taking Anakin by the robe again, he dragged him the entire way back to their quarters.

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><p>"Shut up."<p>

"I didn't say anything," Anakin growled.

"Yes you did. We are connected through the force, remember?"

Anakin looked up at his frustrated and tea-deprived master. In his opinion, the worst combination one could possibly conduct in Obi-Wan. He would take sleep-deprived, but Obi-Wan without tea was like a rancor without lunch. A very patient rancor, who could rip off your arms while reciting Shakespeare in a sophisticated accent. With a beard, which he still didn't like.

"I think your beard is growling at me."

"Beards can't talk, Anakin."

Anakin wasn't so sure, but kept himself from commenting further. About everyone in the temple who had come across Obi-Wan had commented on his beard, which only caused the man to stubbornly allow it to grow wild in the past two weeks. He was pretty sure that there was a stray animal in there, but his master never sat still long enough for him to investigate further.

"Master, I think it's time to let it go."

Kenobi smiled, "When you get the tea restriction lifted, I'll consider it."

"You don't think the council is still upset about that incident from two days ago, do you?" because he seriously doubted it. How long could one group of Jedi stay mad about a master trashing one of their windows from pushing their apprentice through it? Honestly, these people were so stuck up.

"I do," Obi-Wan seethed.

Anakin felt like kicking his master and the way he said it like he knew more than Anakin. Sure, he'd teased him again, but it wasn't him who had thrown his padawan out of the forty -story building with the excuse that, "He's got to learn to catch himself with the force sometime, something I don't think I'm capable to teach."

Mace had had the audacity to laugh and mumble something about how powerful the chosen one was, that bastard.

Obi-Wan made what sounded like whimpering noises from where he stood in front of the coffee maker. Or what was the tea maker two days ago. How could one man fall so quickly in simply two days? His eyes looked tired, his posture was slumped, he growled like a rancor; his hair was flat on his forehead, and his beard added to the look of crazy. Anakin couldn't take it any longer. He had to do something, and quick.

Anakin decided it was time to negotiate with the negotiator.

"You don't have to cut it all off," he reasoned, "honestly, just trim it. I'm sure it will look great shorter."

Obi-Wan turned and did what Anakin presumed was a scowl. It was hard to tell under all that facial hair. Good Force how did Obi-Wan's hair grow at such a rapid pace?

"Anakin, I thank you for your concern, but if you could please leave my personal hygiene to my own talents and thoughts, I would much appreciate it."

He grumbled but buried himself in what he was reading from his holopad. "You'll scare the younglings," he muttered.

Apparently that broke something in Obi-Wan that Anakin had never had the pleasure of seeing, or ever wanted to see again.

"For the love of Yoda Anakin, leave my facial hair alone! It is enough that I have to deal with you complaining about how cold, tired, or sore you are! Don't get me started on when you decide you're bored or hungry, force forbid that ever happens again, no. Obi-Wan changed his hair so let's all comment on it! Yes, great idea. You know what; I had to deal when you changed to black leather after white cotton. Guess what Anakin?"

Anakin opened his mouth to respond to his master's tirade, but a firm fist was placed over it, forbidding him to proceed. "That's right. We're stuck with each other for at least the next five years. Five years Anakin. So leave the beard alone, because it's staying whether you, or any other Jedi, like it or not."

Nervously Skywalker looked up at his red faced master who still hadn't removed his hand from his mouth.

"Understand?" Obi-Wan ground out form clenched teeth. Anakin decided to be nice for once, and nodded his head.

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><p>Five days, and two trips to the council later; Anakin decided that it was time to employ desperate measures. He decided to do what every Jedi who had ever needed anything did.<p>

"Master, please."

"Revoke the tea restriction, I will not. Yet to pay for damages, he has."

"That's because you're taking the money he uses to buy tea, to pay for the workers!"

"Deal, he will."

"Yoda you haven't seen him. He's worse. This is just week one. I've seen him all the way to week six, it gets ugly. Please, just revoke it, and you can take it out of my pocket expense or whatever."

"Pay you yet, we do not."

"Put it on a tab for later."

Anakin nearly fell forward as Yoda walked under him to avoid overzealous younglings.

"Wit, you have. A brain, you should look for."

Skywalker paused in the middle of the temple as Plo Koon chased after the younglings who had begun to disappear along the hall.

"Master, please. Just once, I even have reason to believe he might trim his beard if you do."

Large green ears pricked at the new Intel, "if true this is, then no other choice we have."

Anakin smiled, "Thank you master Yoda. Thank you."

Long lines stretched across Yoda's face as he stared up at Anakin, "Since chosen one, you appear to be, and was you, who had upset our patient Jedi, it is you who will assist in replacing broken window, if your master's tea, you think you will get."

Said chosen one nodded, a little affronted at this whole conversation, but desperate to get his master his tea so that he would stop whining. Or trim his beard.

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><p>Straight after their conversation Anakin had gone to fix the window. He was not going to take another second of Obi-Wan without tea. He couldn't, he wasn't sure how Qui-Gon had ever handled him. The window itself, with the help of republic workers, wasn't too hard to replace. What had taken the most time was cleaning the blasted thing. Adding insult to injury, he learned from an over talkative worker that it had been Mace Windu's idea. Apparently the council wanted it clean for their next meeting. Anakin was almost certain it was because Mace hated him.<p>

Feet dragging, and with no small amount of complaining, Anakin threw open the door to the shared living quarters. Stepping back as the abused door slammed against the well, Anakin was shocked to discover his master sitting calmly on the couch.

In his hand was a holopad, which he suspected had some sort of lame history book about the republic. Though he knew it was most likely just a biography on a dead Jedi.

Feeling extra brave after getting the tea revocation removed, Anakin decided to go for human interaction, "Master?"

Obi-Wan tilted his head to show he was listening, but made no other sound as he continued to scroll through his reading. "Um," Anakin continued, "I just finished with the window. I'm going to take a shower."

Obi-Wan nodded, sipped some tea, and then waved Anakin off.

Confused, but not willing to break his master's calm demeanor, Anakin rushed off to the refresher to get the smell of Windex off of himself. He stopped just before the door as faint humming was heard coming from the kitchen.

Funny, he thought, Obi-Wan was never that happy, unless…

Jogging to the kitchen, he slid to a stop right in front of his master. Who was holding a steaming cup of tea? Behind him several empty boxes of the stuff laid scattered throughout the entire kitchen.

"You, um, saw that the ban was lifted."

"Yoda came and told me," he responded smoothly. Apparently feeling more proper than he had in days, Obi-Wan finished the sentence with a quiet sip of tea.

"Yea, well, glad it's back."

Obi-Wan nodded, "Yes. It would have been unfortunate if it had lasted longer."

Anakni smiled at his master, knowing all too well the truth of that statement, and tried not to comment on the now trimmed and pristine beard.

"So, what are you reading?"

"Go take a shower, Anakin."

He smiled, "No seriously."

His master stopped, took another tip of tea, and then sighed, "Prosthetics, now go away."

Anakin leaned over his shoulder and caught a glance of some diagram explaining an arm prosthetic. "I bet I could make one better than that."

"If you do not go and take a shower you will be forced to!"

When Anakin didn't budge, Kenobi reached for his lightsaber. Taking the hint, he rushed off. Though, a master with tea and a trimmed beard was hardly a foe.

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><p><strong>What do you think? <strong>

**It could use more work, I know, but hopefully you enjoyed it! I would love to get feedback! As always, enjoy, and thanks!**

**SFHD**


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